The one thing that has always been apparent with 'Mental Health' is the 'Stigma' that comes with it.
People can be very ignorant towards those suffering, which doesn't help the 'sufferer'.
Some people aren't intentionally ignorant, it could be down to:
- They don't know, or haven't been educated how to behave in front of or towards someone with mental health issues.
- They may find it difficult approaching somebody suffering because to them it is an 'invisible' illness and because they can't see anything 'physically' wrong, they can avoid communicating with them.
- They may not know what to say and avoid contact because they may feel the person suffering may 'go into one' if they do say something. This is similar to people who have had a bereavement and have lost somebody very close to them. Some people can purposely avoid contact with them as they don't know what to say. All the person wants to here is something like "I am so sorry, and am here for you if you need me." A mentally ill person wants the same kind of response from people. They haven't got two heads. They're not going to start ranting and raving and turn into an ogre if somebody does approach them. Half the battle can be having people communicating with you, being positive, kind and sympathetic.
Avoiding the Stigma of Depression and Bipolar Disorder
This next piece I got from the Internet, and it includes a quote from Patrick Corrigan, PSYD, Professor of Psychology at the Illinois Institute of Technology and Director of the Chicago Consortium for Stigma Research.
Stigma against the mentally ill is bad, and research suggests it is getting worse. "Mental illness is still extremely stigmatised," he says, "thanks in part to television shows that portray this population as dangerous, in need of supervision, and/or wild and irresponsible. That is the public perception, despite evidence that they are no more dangerous than anybody else."
Stigma against the mentally ill comes from two other sources. There is self-stigma, in which a person assumes a "why try" attitude about life goals and tasks.
Research suggests that a staggering 40% to 75% of people never seek out medication and therapy.
Even more insidious is label avoidance, which often leads people to avoid treatment because they don't want to be grouped with the mentally ill.
To be honest with you, you don't see that many story lines on the television about people with Bi-polar/Mental health issues. Eastenders has covered Bi-polar, with Stacey and her mum Jean, both diagnosed with Bi-polar and I thought they tackled the issues in a fantastic way. I could really empathise with both of their portrayals of having the illness. Lacey Turner and Gillian Wright are both excellent actresses and fitted the parts fantastically. What I feel Eastenders was trying to get across to the viewers was :
- There is no rhyme or reason as to who gets Bi-polar, no group of humans are ruled out.
- It can be hereditary and run in the family.
- You MUST always take your medication prescribed to you, and don't stop taking it. That is something your Dr/Psychiatrist must advise you on. Look how Stacey in Eastenders behaved when she stopped taking her tablets. Some of you may be thinking "It's only a television programme." Well, being a sufferer myself, I could relate to Stacey and Jean, and really empathise, which means they got the message across. I was even in tears at some of the acting.
- There is a stigma as both of the characters have been 'labelled'. Only the other night, one character suggested to Jean that she sees little green aliens.
- Sometimes things will be tough, but having caring people around you is half the battle.
I am so glad Eastenders is continuing to cover Bi-polar with Jean Slater, but you don't see that many other programmes covering mental health and if we are going to try to start ending the stigma, the problem needs to be addressed. Alcoholism and drug taking are tackled a lot on the television, which is a good thing, so I would like to see more on mental health. Eastenders is a good platform with their story lines with Jean Slater as the masses of people who tune in.
Above is a clip of Eastenders when Stacey is at the Dr's with her Mum. A moving clip. It is so fitting to what I am writing about as Stacey talks about :-
- Her mum's neighbours making her life hell and taking the mickey out of her because of her Bi polar.
- Stacey admitting to spending in excess.
- Stacey being in denial.
- Being told she will get worse if she doesn't get the help she needs, ie meds.
- Taking risks.
- Her mind feeling like its going twenty to the dozen.
As mentioned a few paragraphs ago, it's not just the people 'looking in' giving mental health a 'stigma', it can also be the sufferers themselves. There is the self-stigma "why try" attitude when you have given up before you have even started the battle.
I was shocked at the percentage of people who never seek out medication and therapy.
And with the 'label avoidance', where people avoid treatment because they don't want to be grouped with the 'mentally ill' due to the stigma it brings.
The above would suggest that there is a lot of people who are in denial out there and are not getting the proper treatment they need. Bi polar people need to be stabilised and without getting the help and medication they need, they won't be.
I do believe half the problem with sufferers feeling this way is because of the stigma non-sufferers have towards the illness, and many would rather brush it under the carpet.
Here is a video of an American lady who is 34, and at various stages of her journey, is in denial about being bi-polar.
Same old scenarios as previously talked about;
- Denial, first and foremost.
- Excessive spending; spending her rent money on things she didn't need or even want.
- Her husband now has control of the household finances, which is a good thing. He gives her an allowance and puts it in her bank. If you are in a relationship, why don't you try this out, there will then be no temptation of excessive spending when in a manic mode.
Here is the link to the Bipolar Chat & Forum she was talking about http://www.bpbabble.com/
The five stages of 'stigma'
1.) Stigma starts with 'labeling someone.' If someone is different than us, parts of society feel more comfortable labelling and dividing. These are not the ways to calm our fears. Education and understanding are the main ways to conquer anything in life.
2.) Stigma continues by 'not accepting that mental illness is a real illness.' 46% of Canadians think that mental illness is an excuse for bad behaviour. Signs of non-acceptance are :
- Pretending that nothing is wrong.
- Believe that it will magically just go away. This includes the individual who is ill and others (like family and friends) of the individual.
Pretending or ignoring will not make cancer, diabetes or anything else go away, so why would people think that about mental illness??!!
Family and friends MUST have acceptance!! You are the biggest influence when it comes to treatment and that persons ability to lead a safe and productive life.
3.) Stop 'associating blame' with the illness. Like diabetes, mental illness can just happen in spite of our best efforts.
4.) 'Get educated' about mental illness; its symptoms and treatments. Find out where to get help.
5.) Start 'talking openly' about it. With discussions, the fears disappear. Education creates understanding. It's so simple!!
When only 50% of Canadians would tell a friend that a family member has a mental illness...While 72% would disclose a cancer diagnosis...There's something seriously wrong!!!
BOTTOM LINE, GET EDUCATED!!!!
How to show you care
What do you say to someone who's got a mental health illness? All too often, it's the wrong thing.
People still have such a cloudy idea of what mental illness is. Below is a list of helpful things to tell someone battling mental health problems, including Bi polar followed by what not to say. This information was courtesy of the Depression Alliance.
Ten things to say (and ten not to say) to someone with a mental illness
1.) I'm here for you.
What to say :
"You're not alone in this."
What not to say:
"There's always someone worse off than you."
2.) You matter
What to say:
"You are important to me."
What not to say:
"No one ever said that life was fair."
3.) Let me help
What to say:
"Do you want a hug?"
What not to say:
"Stop feeling sorry for yourself."
4.) Depression is real
What to say:
"You are not going crazy."
What not to say:
"So you're depressed. Aren't you always?"
5.) There is hope
What to say:
"We are not on this earth to see through one another, but to see one another through."
What not to say:
"Try not to be so depressed."
6.) You can survive this
What to say:
"When all this is over, I'll still be here and so will you."
What not to say:
"It's your own fault."
7.) I'll do my best to understand
What to say:
"I can't really understand why you are feeling, but I can offer you my compassion."
What not to say:
"Believe me, I know how you feel. I was depressed once for several days."
8.) You won't drive me away.
What to say:
"I'm not going to leave you or abandon you."
What not to say:
"I think your depression is a way of punishing us."
9.) I care about you
What to say:
"I love you. (Say this only if you mean it.)"
What not to say:
"Haven't you grown tired of all this "me, me, me" stuff yet?"
10.) We'll get through this together
What to say:
"I'm sorry that you're in so much pain. I am not going to leave you. I am going to take care of myself, so you don't need to worry that your pain might hurt me."
What not to say:
"Have you tried chamomile tea?"
You may think that some of the things 'not to say' are a bit daft and silly, but believe me, I've had even sillier things said to me.
I suppose the worst line anyone who doesn't understand mental health can say is "Pull yourself together!" Many a time I have had that said to me and it is so patronising and insulting.
Even going back to work, after having a spell of sickness, you could tell that some, not all, would walk around on eggshells and not bring up the subject of why I was off.
I do think that workplaces need to be educated on how to treat members of staff with mental health disorders, otherwise it can make the sufferer feel kind of awkward when they return to work, and, in extreme cases, somewhat 'isolated.'
MENTAL HEALTH #END THE STIGMA!!
I wanted to do a blog on the stigma of mental health ever since I started this site as it is such a large problem, and if people aren't educated enough, then the problem is only going to get worse, leaving the sufferer no better off. All they want more than anything is for x or y to go upto them and ask them how they are and let them know they are there for them.
I've posted this advert before, but wanted to post it again as it shows the stigma of mental health. Dave has just returned back to work after a spell of depression. His colleague is contemplating asking him how he is feeling, and there are various 'endings' shown. Beginning with the 'stigma' endings, to the actual factual ending. The moral being Dave hasn't got two heads and isn't going to 'go into one.'
The above is an interactive version of the previous one where you can choose the ending.
This is a good 'anti-stigma' advert. It says people should be educated from a young age about mental health issues, which I totally agree with.
That's the end of Blog 7. I hope I have covered everything.
Please remember if you want to get in touch with me you can at the following :-
Twitter : @BipolarChatroom http://twitter.com/BipolarChatroom (Or send me a DM on Twitter)
Facebook : Type in BipolarChatroom in search and click 'like' at top, or click here :-
E-Mail me : deanhollett@aol.com
Take care for now and hope to hear from you and any feedback on the blog.
Deano :-)
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